If you’re going through hell, keep going. Forty eight hours and counting...

I am so fucking tired of functioning on pills basis! I therefore decided to leave the shitty pills unilaterally.
I am aware that antidepressants should be stoped progressively and that I am not being responsible blah blah but what the hell!!
It feels great (not in a phisical way) being an irresponsible ass once in a while even when you have to suffer freakin' side efects.

Warning: keep out

I am lonely for I don't like the person with whom I am when I am alone

I've touched the center of my own sorrow. I can sit with pain, mine or yours, without moving to hide it, fake it, or fix it. I can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray my own soul, I can be faithful and therefore trustworthy.
However I can't find a single reason to love me. I need to forgive myself "for ignoring you: my highest voices"

Here I miss, much determined ever ill-equipped

Angry and running into the same brick wall a thousand times. I would think about you just for today, from now on, you walk by yourself, and never ask me to walk beside you again.

My emotional blockade is not related to anyone. Emotionally blocked,  yet  I have found myself feeling nostalgic for people who are far away and feelings that do not experience in my life since long time ago.

Far away people and places seem to be farest. Today I cried missing them. I miss Buenos Aires, Ottawa, Colletorto, Geneva. I miss….

I wrote the story myself...

It's about a girl who lost her sanity and never missed it.  She was a borderline case like many others, spent years sending love around and waiting to come around but never happened. 
Gave and gave love until she was unable to feel something for herself. Then she lost herself.
Nobody was there to see that she was tired of life or tired of everything, nobody cared about her.
The moment she felt her soul was cold and empty she decided to lose her mind. Since then, she
is happier and stronger even if, as she cannot feel, she doesn't know it....
During the up and downs of her path  I've been with her and I will never let her alone.

Master reset of mind

I wish I have a reset or pause button. I am fighting against recurring thoughts.
My body is trying to tell me something and instead of taking pills to shut him I stopped to find out the message mother nature is sending me.
The alarm has been set, now is up to me.